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A marriage is likely to be called happy if neither party ever expected to get much happiness out of it.
 
Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.
 
One should always be in love; that is the reason one should never marry.
 
Marrying means to halve one's rights and double one's duties.
 
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
 
Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
 
Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse.
 
A man who desires to get married should know either everything or nothing.
 
Marriage is the waste-paper basket of the emotions.
 
The goal of marriage is not to think alike but to think together.
 
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. And that is a good thing for any man
 
I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't.
 
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
 
Bachelors know more about women than married men do. If they didn't, they'd be married too
 
I tended to place my wife under a pedestal.
 
Love is blind, but marriage restores its sight.
 
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.
 
My wife and I have an agreement. I don't try to run her life and I don't try to run mine.
 
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.
 
If you want to stay single...look for the perfect mate !
 
WEDDING: A necessary formality before securing a divorce.
 
If you are afraid of loneliness, don't marry
 
Bigamy: Marrying a pretty girl and a good cook !
 
No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife isn't saying.
 
SPOUSE: Someone who'll stand by you through all the trouble you wouldn't have had if you'd stayed single.
 
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
 
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.
 
A man in love is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
 
28 quotes